Then, I checked the fine print. I'm no fool. Under consolation prizes, there was "His and Her" diamond watches, valued at $59.95 (you'd probably need a microscope to see the diamonds), three-piece "designer" luggage valued at $59.95 (designed by whom?), a 35mm camera valued at $39.95 (probably one of those throwaway numbers).
Here was the catch: "Allow 90 minutes for your visit" so that you can tour "one of the nation's leading camp resort systems" in Lancaster County and listen to a sales presentation.
Sales promotion? Heh, heh. I was ready. I love a good mind wrestle.
It was a relatively cheap way to spend a Saturday afternoon, taking a leisurely drive through Lancaster County, the heart of outlet country.
It rained.
Nevertheless, my companion, a cheery good-natured sort, and I pulled up to the Outdoor World Resort just outside of Millersville and registered as tour #77 that day.
A Sean Penn lookalike greeted us and noted we lived in Philadelphia.
"I got a place in Northeast Philly and go down for the weekend to go clubbing," he said. So much for his brand of fun.
Within a few minutes, our tour leader, Janet D., a mother of two in her 20s, invited us to a large room filled with tables where six other families were undergoing the sales pitch. She was loaded down with brochures and asked a lot of personal questions.
For only $8,495 - plus $249 in annual dues - Janet told us, we could obtain a basic membership and be able to visit one campsite for 365 days a year for life. This was not a time share, she insisted. You could just live there, if you wanted.
"But what would you get for this?" I kept asking.
"Why don't we visit the campgrounds?" she suggested.
In the parking lot was my 1990 white Chevy Tracker, the one I was here to win. But we were only 30 minutes into the 90-minute presentation. I would have to wait for the keys.
