Dick Morris Did A Dumb Thing, But Don't Discount His Genius

September 09, 1996|BY MIKE ROYKO

Leading Democrats have been cornering anyone with a microphone or a note pad to tell them that the notorious Dick Morris folly is a mere footnote, a fleeting diversion, and will be quickly forgotten.

In Washington political circles, this is known as ``damage control.'' And during the past five years, the Clinton political operatives have had more experience with damage control than all the nation's fire departments combined.

As one party leader sputtered during an interview: ``This has nothing to do with issues, policy or anything of substance.''

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No, that is not necessarily true.

It does raise some serious questions that may have more universal interest than the allegedly serious issues.

One was put to me by a female colleague.

``Why,'' she asked, ``are men so dumb?''

She elaborated: ``Did he have to tell the call girl what he did for a living? I mean, if he could lie to his wife, why couldn't he lie to the bimbo?''

Such frankness by Morris might even be considered unprofessional, since his business is thinking up lies, distortions, evasions or obfuscations to deceive millions of American voters.

Yet, when not nibbling on the toes of the $200-an-hour call girl, he let her eavesdrop on phone conversations with his client, President Clinton.

So if the hired hussy wanted to know what he did for a living, he could have said he owned a chain of hardware stores in North Dakota or something like that. Or if he wanted to impress her, he could have had a friend phone him, then he could have told her: ``Hey, doll, listen. It's the president of True Value. Honest. We're personal pals.''

The female colleague said: ``I read in Time magazine he is some kind of political genius. It amazes me that someone supposed to be that brilliant could be that stupid.''

Which proves once again that in certain matters, someone who is brilliant, even a ``genius,'' doesn't think with the organ between his ears. Gary Hart taught us that. So have many politicians and show business characters and athletes who let other parts of their anatomy dictate their decisions.

I guess it is the nature of men to brag and strut.

As the female colleague put it: ``Maybe it made him feel bigger. Or some parts of him.''

Stanley Giddings, a former bartender in Chicago's Billy Goat Tavern, asked me a question probably being asked by many Americans:

``Why is this man's sex life any of my business?''

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