Lynn Swann's Voting Record 'You're running for governor, you say?'

Posted: February 18, 2006

Lynn Swann, Republican candidate for governor, says he is "proud" of his record of having voted in only 16 of the past 36 elections in Pennsylvania.

We take you now to a polling place in Western Pennsylvania in the not-too-distant future....

Election clerk: Welcome to our precinct. Name, please?

Swann: Hi! I'm Lynn Swann!

Clerk: You're the happiest-looking person I've seen this morning.

Swann: That's because I'm so excited! There's nothing more inspiring than a polling place in action! People waiting in line to perform their civic duty; my supporters outside handing out brightly colored leaflets! TV cameras recording my vote! I love the smell of democracy in the morning!

Clerk: That's probably the fastnachts you're smelling.

Swann: And you! The humble, unpaid public servant, working tirelessly without recognition to keep our foundation of popular government secure! My hat's off to you, good man! I'll bet you needed to get up early to open the polls. When did you get here?

Clerk: 1962.

Swann: Oh. I meant this morning.

Clerk: Got here at 4 a.m. What did you say your name was again?

Swann: Swann, Lynn Swann. I'm running for governor.

Clerk (thumbing through files): Hmmm. Would you spell that for me?

Swann: S-W-A-N-N. Swann. For Pete's sake - I'm in the Hall of Fame.

Clerk: The Pennsylvania Voters Hall of Fame? My goodness. You don't look old enough to have voted in 50 straight general elections.

Swann: Uh, not that Hall of Fame. The Pro Football Hall of Fame.

Clerk (still searching): And you're running for governor, you say? My, this is embarrassing. I'm sure your file is here somewhere. Are you positive that you've voted here before?

Swann: Yes. Look, I have missed quite a few elections over the years. I travel. But the issues facing this state go far beyond my voting record. For example, the shoddy recordkeeping of this election precinct is inexcusable.

Clerk: If you don't take part in the process and don't vote, then I am not willing to listen to your complaints. Let me just look in one other - here it is! "Swann, Lynn." Somebody filed you in our "inactive" folder by mistake. Just sign right here, Mr. Swann.

Swann: Unbelievable.

Clerk: Go right ahead into the booth, Mr. Swann. What? That handle there? It closes the curtain.

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