Dressing down is the trend for God's day

September 01, 2008|By David O'Reilly, Inquirer Staff Writer

The Rev. David Moyer still remembers the gasp as the beautiful young bride came up the aisle.

"What was that about?" he wondered.

So Moyer, the conservative rector of Good Shepherd Episcopal Church in Rosemont, went ahead with the nuptials - quite unaware of how backless the bride's dress really was.

"It wasn't until I blessed them and they turned around that I looked down," he recalled with a laugh, "and saw her butt crack."

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Moyer said nothing at the time. But after years of watching wedding gowns grow skimpier and more revealing, he'd had enough.

"I never thought I'd see the day," he said last week, "but I now tell couples in premarital counseling that their wedding clothes must be dignified and lovely."

Glance around churches any weekend and it's plain that "proper dress" is just a quaint memory for some people - and an alien concept to others.

Gone from most congregations are men in jackets and ties and shiny shoes. Women in heels and dresses - never mind hats - can be a rarity, too. It's a trend some clergy lament and others accept.

"Sunday has lost its sense of being a special day, and I think the clothes went with it," said the Rev. Joseph McLoone, pastor of St. Katharine Drexel parish in Chester.

"People dress a lot more casually than they used to, but I'm just happy they're in church."

Notions of proper church dress can also vary according to income, age and ethnicity, said McClune, many of whose parishioners live modestly. For a struggling immigrant family, he said, "it might mean their clothes are clean."

Some synagogues, too, have noticed the change. Dress standards are "a hard thing to balance," said Rabbi Neil Cooper of Congregation Beth Hillel-Beth El in Wynnewood. "We all want our places to be inclusive, and we don't want people to feel as if they are not welcome because they're not dressed up.

"On the other hand, we're standing before God, and the way we dress is a reflection of the seriousness with which we take an encounter. If you were going to meet with the president of the United States, how would you dress?"

Most religious leaders say they don't impose a dress code for fear of discouraging attendance.

"We just want people to feel welcome," Richard Stanislaw, president and chief executive officer of the Jersey Shore's interfaith Ocean City Tabernacle, said before a 10:30 service last month.

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