Later that morning, the nurse gently suggested it was time for Janaya to hold the baby.
That will calm him, she said.
But Janaya was still worried.
He is too fragile. I might hurt him.
She pumped more milk.
Around noon, the nurse asked Janaya again if she was ready to hold the baby.
No, not yet.
At 1:20 p.m. Exarhoulakos grabbed a robe out of the cupboard and handed it to Janaya.
Skin to skin is best, said the young woman.
As the hesitant 35-year-old mother removed her top and put on the loose-fitting robe, Exarhoulakos untangled the wires and tubes connecting Makoa to the monitors, nutrition, and medications.
The nurse lifted Makoa out of his warmer and handed him to his mother.
The baby howled. His heart rate soared, and the monitor rang out.
"I'm sorry, baby, so sorry. . . . I'm sorry," Janaya whispered in his ear.
"Is he comfortable? Are you sure he's OK? How's he look?" she asked.
"Give him a little time," Exarhoulakos said.
In moments, Makoa quieted, as did the heart monitor.
He laid his head on Janaya's chest, closed his eyes, and fell asleep.
She looked up at John and down at their sleeping baby.
Janaya found herself smiling. He was 7 days old. To her surprise, her breasts filled with milk, a nursing reflex she'd heard about but hadn't experienced yet.
One more thing that was out of her control.
She could live with that.
Four days later, Makoa was cleared to get his first bottle. He sucked down 5 milliliters of his mother's stored milk. She fed him.
After a week, Janaya was able to breast-feed her son.
He was discharged at 1:04 p.m. on Feb. 24, after 22 days.
Today, Makoa is making a steady recovery and eating well.
He weighs nearly 11 pounds.
Contact staff writer Josh Goldstein
at 215-854-4733 or jgoldstein@phillynews.com.
