Gary Thompson: 'Expendables' so bad you'll want to 'Eat Pray Love'

Sylvester Stallone directed and acted in "The Expendables."
Sylvester Stallone directed and acted in "The Expendables."
Posted: November 26, 2010

THERE'S A turkey joke looming for the Thanksgiving DVD release of "The Expendables," but I'll leave it alone, because many people mysteriously liked this movie.

Sylvester Stallone's sloppily made "Magnificent Seven" earned $100 million thanks to its reputed screen union of action stars Stallone, Bruce Willis, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Jason Statham, Jet Li, Dolph Lundgren, and on and on.

Most of these turned out to be bait-and-switch cameos, and those stars who did contribute something were stranded in a nonsensical story about mercenaries overthrowing the oppressive regime of a Central American government. I'm betting that the behind-the-scenes features are more interesting than the scenes themselves.

For the ladies, there's "Eat Pray Love," starring Julia Roberts in an adaptation of the popular nonfiction memoir. The movie replicates the author's journey, but manages to make her personal growth look like self-absorption.

Speaking of which, we also get "I'm Still Here," the fake documentary about Joaquin Phoenix's purported journey of self-destruction, even more off-putting than the real thing.

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