Steve and Mia: Wife's Facebooking bothers him

Mia: A lot of folks do use Facebook for fooling around. All you have to do is log on to see married folks who don't bother to list their relationship status. Sending someone a Facebook request is the modern-day equivalent to saying, "Do you come here often?" But you'll never know what's going on with your partner until you sit down and have a heart-to-heart.

Maybe take her out to a candlelit dinner and, over dessert, bring up the issue of social networking. Get her to talk with you about the new people she's meeting or old acquaintances she's renewing. Something tells me all her online friending is innocent, but it can't hurt for you to subtly remind her how much you love her and how important she is to you.

Steve: You should get on Facebook and friend her. If she turns you down, then you'll know something is up.

Q: Am I a prude to be weirded out by my boyfriend's prostate massager? I saw it in his nightstand when I was snooping around and I can't get it out of my head. It makes me wonder what other kinky stuff he's into.

Steve: I didn't know such a thing existed until I read your e-mail. As best as I can figure, this device is for guys who enjoy visits to their proctologist.

Whatevs.

The next time you're talking about sex with him, ask for his views on toys and devices and see where it leads.

Mia: You'll never know until you ask him. But if you come off all school-marmy, he's going to clam up big time, and you'll never find out what other toys he has hidden in his love pad. So trade the judgmental attitude for one that's merely curious, at least until you figure out what's up.