Sideshow: A new crew for 'Jersey Shore'?

Posted: June 25, 2011

Each day, there is a dawn. Hope! The world will see a better future.

How do we know? Because Anonymous Sources tell TMZ that, despite MTV's denials, once filming of Season 5 is done this summer (shooting, of the filmic kind, starts Monday), so's the cast of Jersey Shore.

Can I hear an amen? A boo-yah?!!

An all-new cast of guidos and guidettes will pollute Season 6, it's said. That has to be better. Doesn't it?

Maybe not . . . all of Shore's headliners - Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi, Mike "The Situation" Sorrentino, Paul "DJ Pauly D" Delvecchio, and Jenni "Jwoww" Farley - are said to be getting spin-off shows. (But what of Ronnie Ortiz-Magro, Sammi Giancola, Vinny Guadagnino, or Deena Nicole Cortese? Don't go!!!)

So is the beach house half-full or half-empty? Have we said addio to an old evil or buon giorno to four new ones? Is there a philosopher in the house?

All's well that ends well

Yes! There's Oswald Spengler, who wrote in 1917's Decline of the West that Western civilization was at its nadir. Wrong!

Western civ, in fact, will hit bottom Sunday, on Keeping Up With the Kardashians, when Kim sees a doctor to have her bottom X-rayed. Why? Because said bottom is so globally admired that some haters have charged her with using hindquarter helpers. Butt buddies. Assists. Implants. The X-rays were sis Khloé's idea. Yes, we know. Dumber than a dead carp. It's reality TV.

All three K's go see the MD. Sis Kourtney, who sports breast implants, volunteers to have her pectoral bonus X-rayed so her artificial amplitude can be compared with Kim's bounteous backside. Kim's keister proves authentic. Kourtney blogs that the formation in question "is 100% real!!!"

Usher wants P-Middy

Speaking of bodies, Usher, who's got a nice one, has his eye, like many men, on Pippa Middleton, sister to Kate, who's married to future king-type Prince William. Usher's shopping for a high-profile spokeslady for his lingerie line. "I'm going to be approaching her in the next few weeks and setting up a meeting this summer," said the widely desired Usher. BTW, P-Middy has broken up with Alex Loudon. More for us!!!!

Stuff of middling to small size

Owen Wilson has broken up with Jade Duell, who gave birth to the couple's son, Robert, five months ago. . . . Peter Frampton has filed for divorce (it'd be his third) from Tina Elfers after 15 years. He seeks custody and visitation rights for their daughter, actress Mia Rose, 15 (Bridesmaids). . . . Sara Ramirez (Dr. Callie Torres on Grey's Anatomy) is engaged to bf Ryan Debolt. . . . Remember Cameron and Tyler Winklevoss, from The Social Network? Those prissy twins who swan around and complain they got swindled by Mark Zuckerberg when, they allege, he stole their ideas to make Facebook? The real Winklevii, and fellow Harvard dude Divya Narendra, won a $65 million ruling against Facebook in 2008. It wasn't enough. They tried to get more, got told no, threatened to take it to the U.S. Supreme Court, then said Thursday they were dropping the challenge. But they must really like courtrooms. On Friday, they filed a new suit. . . . Big week for Oprah Winfrey! Dinner Tuesday in Johannesburg, South Africa, with Michelle Obama, then an honorary degree Friday from University of the Free State in Joburg!


This article contains information from Inquirer wire services and websites. Contact "SideShow" at sideshow@phillynews.com.

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