Tattle: Kim & Kris tie the knot

Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries share a kiss.
Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries share a kiss. (JASON MERRITT / GETTY IMAGES)
Posted: August 22, 2011

NOW THAT Kim Kardashian has wed NBA hoopster Kris Humphries, Tattle gives their honeymoon period about two months.

In the fall there will be an anonymous insider quoted about how their marriage is on the rocks.

But, in the meantime, let's let them enjoy their happiness.

Kim, 30, and Kris, 26, tied the knot Saturday night in the exclusive Montecito area near Santa Barbara, Kim's publicist Jill Fritzo told People magazine and E!

She sort of had to tell E! since it landed the TV rights for a wedding two-parter in October.

It is the first marriage for Kris and the second for Kim. She was married to music producer Damon Thomas from 2000 to 2004.

Kim wore an ivory gown designed by Vera Wang.

You'd think a self-promoter like Kim would have at least worn something from her own new clothing line - available at Sears.

Kim's stepfather, Bruce Jenner, walked her down the aisle in front of 440 guests, including Demi Lovato, Mario Lopez, Eva Longoria, Sugar Ray Leonard, Alan Thicke and Lindsay Lohan.

Kim's gown had a tulle skirt, basque waist and Chantilly lace, and was matched with Giuseppe Zanotti shoes.

Kourtney, 32, and Khloe, 27, served as maid and matron of honor, respectively.

Kris wore a white peak-lapel tuxedo jacket, black tuxedo pants and a white shirt and a white bow tie, all designed by Ermenegildo Zegna.

Really? He designed the bow tie?

The price tag on the wedding was reportedly $10 million, but the London Mail says that Kim and the other Ks may end up coming out ahead on the deal once the freebies are accounted for and the various rights are sold off.

Some of the freebies, according to the Mail, included $10,000 worth of wedding invitations from Lehr & Black and a $6,000 cake from Hansen's Cakes.

(By comparison, Tattle's birthday cake from Riviera Bakehouse, in Ardsley, New York, cost $22 and was delicious.)

Kris also reportedly got Kim's $2 million Lorraine Schwartz ring at a bargain price. The three Wang dresses ($20K each) were gifted.

* To make this garish affair even more ridiculous, Kim's mother, (also named) Kris, reportedly primped with a $50,000 facelift.

Republicans may say that taxing the rich is unsound economic policy, but the government has Tattle's permission to tax the Kardashians at Eisenhower-era rates. They don't need the money. They don't pay for anything.

TATTBIT

* In one of the dopiest lawsuits that we've seen in awhile (and we see some doozies), Lindsay Lohan is suing rapper Pitbull because in his song, "Give Me Everything," he uses her name without permission.

The New York Post says that according to the suit, the song includes "unwarranted, unauthorized and unfavorable mention of plaintiff's name."

The lyric in questions goes "Hustlers move aside, so I'm tiptoein', to keep flowin'/I got it locked up like Lindsay Lohan."

 The Post says that Lindsay is demanding all profits from the song and all copies of the recording (which would, by the way, severely limit its profits). She contends that Pitbull "knowingly participated, aided and conspired with to violate [her] right to privacy."

What right to privacy the song violates, we have no idea - Lindsay did go to jail and it's not like it was a secret.

What's next? Is "Stacy's Mom" suing Fountains of Wayne?

Daily News wire services

contributed to

this report.

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