Steve and Mia: GIRLFRIEND DENIES HIM SEX

Q: My significant other and I have been seeing each other for 12 years. After six years of great sex, she started pulling back. She referred to my petting as grabbing. She never really liked to kiss. Then she stopped having intercourse. I consider myself a touchy-feely man, and I miss the closeness. I've stayed with her hoping that she would change, but she hasn't. I am 73 years old. She is 64, attractive and physically active and takes care of her health. She refuses to seek counseling. If I break up with her she will be hurt, but I wonder if I should just do what is right for me.

Steve: Yes. Tell her you cannot have a loving relationship without intimacy. If she makes no effort to change, leave. At your age, the pool of available women is huge.

Mia: Steve's right. You're not married. Time to move on. Don't be surprised, though, when your stubborn girlfriend suddenly rediscovers her libido and tries to lure you back.

Q: What do I do with an ex-wife who constantly refuses to adhere to our divorce agreement? We have joint legal custody, which she says means nothing because the children live with her. Child support has always been up to date. I have never missed my parenting time despite her sometimes not arriving with the children or not allowing me phone access when scheduled. She flatly refuses to discuss the children's education, physical and emotional welfare or religious upbringing - all provided for in the agreement. Sadly, our children know all about this situation and it affects them, too. I have been out of work for a year and simply cannot afford a lawyer or even the $100 filing fee to complain to the Friend of the Court. Any advice?

Mia: This is so common, but there's free help available. Parent Help, a project of Child Find of America, can try to talk some sense into your ex and also help you understand your options. Their website is parenthelp-ny.org, but you can also call 800-716-3468.

Steve: Good advice, Mia. And in Philly, you can join the Pennsylvania Families' and Children's Equality organization, paface.org. This is a self-help group made up of noncustodial parents who help each other with issues such as the one you're facing. Their number is 1-877-4PAFACE.