And I keep getting sacked.
Then, I start to worry: Am I too old for this? This is terrifying. I'm only 28. I used to destroy people in Tecmo Super Bowl. Now I'm getting annihilated by foulmouthed children over Xbox Live.
Vexed, I get in touch with Madden creative director Mike Young. He says he loved Tecmo Super Bowl as a kid; I figure he might offer a sympathetic ear. I ask if the team is concerned with Madden getting too complicated. He mentions the GameFlow feature, where plays are essentially selected for you by "coordinators," but says the game is complicated because, well, that's what people want.
Madden's audience is not the casual gamer. Really, it never was. "We play to a core audience of people who love the game," he said. "Are we really going to attract an 8-year-old to the game by making it easier?"
Oof! Yes, I'm at the level of an 8-year-old in this game.
What he's saying makes sense, though. The casual fan simply isn't as big of a moneymaker for EA as Madden freebasers are. The people buy the game every year and want the simulation as realistic as possible. And why not try to appease your biggest fans? I don't have the time, energy or reflexes to complete at a teenager's level of Madden. (Seitchick wasn't yet 20 when he won the title.) But that's OK. The game's a fantastic play even if I'm not that good at it.
That appeal to the hard-core fan base creates a game that often impresses with its attention to detail. Quarterbacks shy away from Eagles cornerback Nnamdi Asomugha both in real life and in the game. When I play with the Eagles in Madden, the field is cut in half; if opponents try to throw his way, they quickly give up. Young says the tweaks to defensive ratings this year make the players more like their real-life counterparts. Asomugha is certainly pretty realistic.
The joy of playing a Madden game is that it's so well-designed, I never really cared if Michael Vick was hitting the turf six times a game. And one of these days I'll learn how to spot a blitz.