Answer: Sure, but you can't spell it out that way. And you also can't do it without your husband's backing. You and he need to talk about it, and agree that you and the daughter don't have to be friends but you do need to be civil and treat each other with respect. Then he needs to agree that he will gently draw the line any time he witnesses poor treatment, and ask her to move out if she refuses to behave respectfully.
You, too, will have to do your part. First, you need to grant your husband license to tell you when you're doing something to aggravate the situation. He has it regardless, but articulating that is an important goodwill gesture.
