Dear Abby: Seriously overweight husband presents big issues for wife

Posted: December 13, 2011

DEAR ABBY: I am 35 and my husband is 45. When we met, he weighed 375 pounds. He has now hit the 600-pound mark. I have five kids, a full-time job and go to school two nights a week. He talks about losing weight, but it's easier to talk about than actually do. He was in a car accident that left him with back problems, and he has bad knees from sports.

The future doesn't look promising. I know that one day he'll be confined to bed - I predict in the very near future - and I will have to drop everything to take care of him. He is already dependent on me and the older kids. He doesn't have insurance.

This is very depressing. I am thinking of seeing a counselor. He has already told me that he won't go. Your input would be greatly appreciated.

- Wife of a Big Man

DEAR WIFE: Talk to a counselor right away. Unless you do something now, you will be unemployed and homebound with a sick husband and five dependent children. Who enabled your helpless husband to gain all the weight?

His life depends upon him being on a strict, sensible nutrition regimen. Because he has no insurance, a self-help group could be a lifesaver. Overeaters Anonymous may be able to give you some guidance and offer him emotional support. Check your phone book, or contact them online at www.oa.org.

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