Christine M. Flowers: Men attending 'The Nutcracker'? It's true

December 16, 2011

LAST SATURDAY night, I went to see "The Nutcracker." It was exactly 40 years after the first time I sat in those red velvet seats at the Academy of Music, but this 50-year-old woman saw the same magic (and felt the same butterflies) as the fourth-grader inside her. Life is made up of many things, but the best ones conjure memories of places and times that no longer exist. "The Nutcracker" does that for me, sending me back decades to my first official date with my first (and best) love: Dad.

That thought triggered another: There were an awful lot of men in the audience. While I noticed a good number of fathers with their fancy-dress princesses, there were also a bunch of younger guys with their girlfriends/wives/Match.com prospects. Which led me to question whether they were there, like I was, because they loved watching ladies in white tulle tiptoe across the stage under artificial snow or - more likely - that they were strong-armed into going to the ballet. Because, although most men like to see scantily clad ladies dancing in tulle, I'm guessing that Tchaikovsky isn't tops on the playlist.

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When I mentioned this to a friend, she called me a female chauvinist pig (whereupon I asked her if she'd spent all weekend watching a Norman Lear marathon). But she did have a point. Why do I get to eat, sleep and breathe football four months out of the year and demand it as a birthright, but men who go to the ballet are only faking their enthusiasm? Why am I allowed to worship at the altar of Lombardi, but a gent who can name all of Balanchine's baby ballerinas is a case study out of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders?

This incident showed me how prejudiced I really am when it comes to certain things. Just as I get frustrated when women tell me how stupid it is for a professional to scream like a banshee when a monster in cleats pushes the other team's monster in cleats into the grass, thereby ensuring a fourth and long, I should be equally upset when a woman (me, I guess) questions the motives of a culture aficionado who just happens to have an XY chromosome (a full set, unlike the monsters in cleats).

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