The Coast Guard was patrolling the area and heard Crowe call out to them from the shore about 10 p.m., Swieciki said.
What did he call out?
"My name is Maximus Decimus Meridius, Commander of the Armies of the North, General of the Felix Legions, loyal servant to the true emperor, Marcus Aurelius. Father to a murdered son, husband to a murdered wife. And I will have my vengeance, in this life or the next."
Eh, probably not, because Swieciki didn't recognize Crowe when he paddled over to the boat. The Coast Guard officers pulled Crowe and his friend up and, along with their kayaks, gave them a ride to Huntington Harbor.
"He just needed a little bit of help; he just got a little lost," Swieciki said. "It wasn't really a rescue, really, more of just giving someone a lift."
"Thanks to Seth and the boys from the US Coast Guard for guiding the way . . . 4 hrs 30 mins, 7m (11.2km)," Crowe tweeted early Sunday morning.
Ironically, Crowe is on Long Island filming "Noah," a Darren Aronofsky biblical epic about a man and his ark.
* In other epic movie news, Warner Bros. and Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer announced Friday the titles and release dates of Peter Jackson's "Hobbit" trilogy.
1. "The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey," Dec. 14, 2012.
2. "The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug," Dec. 13, 2013.
3. "The Hobbit: There and Back Again," July 18, 2014.
Adapted from J.R.R. Tolkien's beloved masterpiece, the "Hobbit" series will be released in High Frame Rate 3-D, other 3-D formats, IMAX, 2-D and tiny Hobbit-size.
More 'Expendables' news
In Friday's Tattle, correspondent Jerome Maida provided the scoop on the possiblility of action star Cynthia Rothrock appearing in an all-female "Expendables." Today, his inside sources dish on the men.
One source close to the franchise told Maida that the media have been "too harsh" on Sylvester Stallone for allegedly not doing enough to promote the sequel - and blaming him for the film's less-than-expected box-office performance so far.
"In the past month, the man has lost his son and his sister," the insider said. "Can everybody treat him like a human being and cut him some slack? At least for a little while?"
Although it has become Hollywood gospel that Steven Seagal turned down a role in "The Expendables" because of a disagreement with Stallone over plot, an insider says that is not the case.
"Seagal was not ever offered a role in the 'Expendables' franchise," he said. "Either he or his agent put that out there. Stallone and him haven't spoken in about 20 years! You have to remember, this is a franchise that has helped a few people restart or reignite their careers. But he absolutely was never offered that opportunity."
"What this franchise shows is that there really aren't many true Hollywood stars anymore that have the talent and charisma to carry a film," said an insider. "Obviously, a few are with this franchise. But part of the mystique is gone because we're so interconnected. It used to be a big deal if a movie star did a junket interview for your city's paper. Now I have 40 papers on my iPhone and people from Toledo to the mountains of Tibet to the middle of the desert have an iPhone or iPad. So everybody knows so much about these celebrities.
"That said, Brad Pitt is a legitimate movie star. So is George Clooney. So is Johnny Depp. People enjoy Johnny Depp from Toledo to Timbuktu, which is why his 'Pirates' movies each gross over $1 billion worldwide and why Disney just shelled out $116 million for him to do 'Pirates 5.' I personally would have been happy with just two, but Disney knows how to get blood - and money - out of a stone. They'll keep making them as long as people keep coming."
Philly to get Venom
Marvel Entertainment says that Venom - a brute with big teeth and an elongated tongue who's made a habit of sparring with Spider-Man - is leaving New York City to start fresh . . . in Philadelphia.
Writer Cullen Bunn and editor Tom Brennan, a Drexel alum, said that it's time Philly had a hero of its own.
Whether Venom is a hero is up for debate, but he's trying.
The city will make its debut in "Venom" No. 28, due Dec. 19 in comic shops and online.
"I worked in public schools in gritty Kensington and tough West Philly," Brennan said. "I spent way too many hours in the Constitution Center and historical sites of Old City. I lived on Race Street in a less-than-stellar apartment in a creaky, old town house.
"All the while that I lived there, I wanted a superhero for the city of Philadelphia, a town full of heart, hustle and hope - and I don't care what anyone says - some of the nicest people I've ever met," he said. "Sure, they don't suffer fools, and you've got to be mindful if you cross against the light, but I found the City of Brotherly Love to be a character in and of itself that I thought more fiction should explore."
* The October Vanity Fair will report that back in 2004, Scientology auditioned women to be Tom Cruise's girlfriend.
Since Tom is single again, can "The Tom Cruise Project" become a new Bravo reality show?
- Daily News wire services contributed to this report.