She's cut sex till he cuts beard

Posted: April 07, 2013

 D  EAR ABBY: I'm married to the love of my life. Our 25th anniversary will be here soon. My issue is, my husband has a beard I cannot stand. It's long and unkempt, and makes him look 10 years older than he is.

He keeps telling me about women and co-workers who tell him what a "nice full beard" he has. I don't care what these women think.

I am withholding sex (which is very important to him) until he trims it, and no longer make eye contact with him because I can't stand looking at him. What should I do? Shouldn't he respect my wishes?

- In a Hairy Situation in Duluth

DEAR HAIRY SITUATION: If you want to make your marriage last 26 years, please stop using sex as a weapon to manipulate your husband. That said, your opinion should supersede that of the women he sees at work. A beard can be flattering if it is kept clean and trimmed. If it's not, a man can look like Howard Hughes in his latter days, which is truly unfortunate.

Because you are unable to get your message across, enlist the help of your husband's barber. Perhaps he can get through to him.

DEAR ABBY: I'm planning on moving into the same apartment complex as my ex-boyfriend. It's all I can afford and still be close to where my family lives. He'll be on one side, and I'll be on the far side.

Should I text him and let him know I'm moving nearby but I'm not stalking him? Or should I keep my mouth shut and hope he never sees my car?

- Too Close for Comfort?

DEAR TOO CLOSE?: Before you sign the lease, ask yourself how you would feel if you saw your ex-boyfriend involved with another woman. If it would be painful, then it would be healthier for you to find an apartment elsewhere.

Next, ask yourself why your ex might think you were stalking him. If there is a grain of truth to it, again, you should not move there. If, however, there isn't, it is not necessary to text him about anything. If he sees your car and has a problem with it, do not make it your problem. The romance is over and so is the drama. Live your life and let him live his.

DEAR ABBY: I recently sent my wife flowers, but she took umbrage because I didn't take the time to stop by the florist and jot down a message myself. I phoned in the order and dictated the message instead. I am hurt and mystified over this alleged faux pas. Did I commit a social no-no?

- Steven in St. Louis

DEAR STEVEN: Of course not. For your wife to have criticized your gift was ungracious. She may have been upset about something else, or having a bad day. Dictating the message on the card was perfectly appropriate.

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