Brangelina

The hopes of thousands of paparazzi were shattered over the weekend when a rumored super-secret celeb wedding in Cernobbio, Italy, didn't happen. As of this writing, Brangelina have not entered the state of holy matrimony in the town or at George Clooney's nearby villa. Cernobbio Mayor Simona Saladini was crestfallen. "We are at the end of our rope," town rep Giuseppe Salvioni said. No word if he and Simona will take their case to the U.N. B for box office Matrix geniuses Andy and Larry Wachowski's decision to shave Natalie Portman's pate has paid off. Their anti-totalitarian actioner V for Vendetta is top of the charts, earning $26.1 mil over its opening weekend, proving that antidespotism is one popular stance.

COULD THERE BE trouble afoot in the world of glamourpuss, do-gooder movie-star couple Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie? The Star says yes. And if there isn't, the Star is going to stir the pot a little. So what's the big problem? Is it as Life & Style Weekly shouts, "Brad Tells Angie: I still love Jen!" Not according to the Star. The problem, it reports, was Maddox's fifth birthday party. F-i-a-s-c-o. Brad's family reportedly flew in from Missouri but cut their visit short after two days and left on Maddox's big day. "Things were very tense that weekend," an anonymous friend of someone tells the Star.

In an epochal, historic event sure to echo down the generations, Angelina Jolie, 36, and Brad Pitt, 48, have announced they are to wed. We're all choked up. Is this how people felt when Neil Armstrong took those fateful first steps on the moon? "It's confirmed," Pitt rep Cynthia Pett-Dante tells Reuters. "It is a promise for the future and their kids are very happy. There's no date set at this time. " Jolie this week was seen sporting a large, yet tasteful diamond ring.

Jen Aniston happy for Brangelina I'm so glad Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie waited until Brad's ex — Jennifer Aniston — found a man (Justin Theroux) before announcing their plans to wed. I don't think we could have managed the tears — and the endless media verbiage that would otherwise have ensued. "[Jen] is so in love with Justin that she is really grateful how things turned out," Anonymous Source tells gossip site HollywoodLife.com. "In a strange way, if it weren't for Angelina, Jennifer would not have connected with Justin in a romantic way. " Isn't it great how things turn out?

Brangelina twins have arrived. Or haven't Guess that wasn't the North Star shining above Brangelina's villa in France's Provence region. Or was it? The media were at war with themselves yesterday with contradictory reports about the most significant human birth since the last celeb baby, Brangelina's twins. TV's Entertainment Tonight cites an anon "source close to [Angelina] Jolie" who says Isla Marcheline and Amelie Jane Jolie-Pitt were delivered into the world by C-section at a Catholic clinic in Aix-en-Provence earlier this week.

Barack Obama ? Mitt Romney ? Rick Santorum ? "None!" the nation has cried out. The people's - our - choice is Katy Perry ! Perry won big at the 38th annual People's Choice Awards Wednesday night at the Nokia Theatre in Lalaland, sweeping up five awards, including favorite female artist. Seems the young singer's disastrous marriage to Russell Brand didn't hamper her chances. Emma Stone and Johnny Depp won for fave actress and actor.

Seems Pennsylvania's other major metropolis, Pittsburgh, has so offended the delicate, cultivated tastes of Brit actress Sienna Miller, 24, that she found it necessary to refer to the city with a dirty name (sounds like the city, but it incorporates a four-letter word for refuse). Jude Law's on-off-on-again luvpartner, who's filming an adaptation of Michael Chabon's The Mysteries of Pittsburgh, was in full whiny-pathetic diva mode, telling a Rolling Stone reporter, "Can you believe this is my life?

Vehemence came into play yesterday in the service of lovebunnies Jameron, People.com says, as in an anonymous source "vehemently denies a published report that" Justin Timberlake and Cameron Diaz "have split up. " The claim comes from gossip Janet Charlton (www.janetcharltonshollywood.com) who said a source said Cameron said "she is devastated. " Now, TMZ.com says the rumor has been that Justin wants to take up with Lauren Popeil. And that's probably because he's actually head over heels for the genius of her inventor dad Ron Popeil - that Ronco founder guy who does infomercials for that awesome, amazing Showtime Rotisserie ST5000.

Jen Aniston happy for Brangelina I'm so glad Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie waited until Brad's ex — Jennifer Aniston — found a man (Justin Theroux) before announcing their plans to wed. I don't think we could have managed the tears — and the endless media verbiage that would otherwise have ensued. "[Jen] is so in love with Justin that she is really grateful how things turned out," Anonymous Source tells gossip site HollywoodLife.com. "In a strange way, if it weren't for Angelina, Jennifer would not have connected with Justin in a romantic way. " Isn't it great how things turn out?

In an epochal, historic event sure to echo down the generations, Angelina Jolie, 36, and Brad Pitt, 48, have announced they are to wed. We're all choked up. Is this how people felt when Neil Armstrong took those fateful first steps on the moon? "It's confirmed," Pitt rep Cynthia Pett-Dante tells Reuters. "It is a promise for the future and their kids are very happy. There's no date set at this time. " Jolie this week was seen sporting a large, yet tasteful diamond ring.

Barack Obama ? Mitt Romney ? Rick Santorum ? "None!" the nation has cried out. The people's - our - choice is Katy Perry ! Perry won big at the 38th annual People's Choice Awards Wednesday night at the Nokia Theatre in Lalaland, sweeping up five awards, including favorite female artist. Seems the young singer's disastrous marriage to Russell Brand didn't hamper her chances. Emma Stone and Johnny Depp won for fave actress and actor.

YOU MAY have heard the rumor that Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie would be moving to, or living in Blue Bell, but that's not the case. However, we have a pretty good idea how it might have started. Strip-club mogul Robert Laflar , who owns Oasis Gentlemen's Club and Christine's Steakhouse, told us yesterday that he is hosting the Pitt/Jolie clan at his 40,000-square-foot Blue Bell mansion this summer while Pitt is here to shoot a movie. Problem is, the movie Pitt's gearing up to shoot, "World War Z," a zombie thriller, will be shooting in Scotland, not Philadelphia.

EAGLES OWNER Jeff Lurie and wife, Christina , say that they haven't given much thought to taking the stage on Oscar night, but they'll have to start thinking about it now. Their movie "Inside Job" has been nominated for best documentary, ending their self-imposed, in-house ban on any discussion of the topic. "We really hadn't made any plans yet," Jeff told Daily News movie reviewer Gary Thompson yesterday. "We didn't want to jinx it," said Christina, who's produced numerous other movies and who knows that having a worthy picture is no guarantee of a nomination.

Rupert Everett , whose Ernest was so earnestly flippant in Oliver Parker 's Oscar Wilde adaptation, The Importance of Being Earnest , isn't impressed by screen idol Jennifer Aniston , whose Friends character was so aggressively earnest. Rupe tells BBC Radio 4 that movie stars are wildly overrated. "Jennifer Aniston will have one too many total flops, but she's still a member of that [A-list] club," says Rupe, now lapsing into a wild poesy half Yeats , half Lewis Carroll , "and she will still manage to . . . like a star forming in the universe, things will swirl around her and it will suddenly solidify into another vital tasteless romcom, you know, a little glitter next to the Crab Nebula.

UNCOVERING THE facts behind Brad and Angelina's split/non-split has been a daunting task. Every anonymous source - always the most trustworthy - says something different. _ They're done. _ They're together. _ They've split up their assets. _ She's getting the children. _ He bought an L.A. mansion with a cave. _ It's all Jen's fault. _ Maddox and Suri Cruise's secret affair has broken them apart. Who can keep track? Thankfully, Life & Style has uncovered, in its own words, "the truth.

TATTLE TAKES a page out of "Action News" today by teasing you with a report that Tiger Woods has officially reached the 19th hole, but our top story is the madness surrounding the alleged split of Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie. The story has spread throughout the British tabs like viral wildfire and picked up steam when Brad was a no-show at the Screen Actor's Guild Awards Saturday night. London's Daily Mail reported that the pair had agreed on a $330 million split with Angelina retaining custody of their six children and Brad gaining visitation.

Viewers vote: We want Tina Will Tina Fey reprise her smash-hit Saturday Night Live turn as Republican vice-presidential candidate and Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin? Fey isn't saying. Saturday's 5 1/2-minute skit with SNL's Amy Poehler (as Sen. Hillary Clinton) was the highest-rating SNL skit in years, a viral smash on YouTube and many another Web site, and the subject of an outpouring of viewer requests for an encore. But SNL producers and Fey, probably enjoying every moment, are playing it day-to-day.