October 20, 1995 |
Monday morning at the township building. The first sips of coffee taken. The first bits of filing done. Another jam in the copier. Great. Call the repair crew. But deep within the dark recesses of paper trays, hidden springs and oily gears, an intriguing, exotic piece of heavy-stock paper was folded like an accordion. According to township sources familiar with the machine, the thick blue paper read: "Please Elect Bob Malason, Limerick Tax Collector. " And thus did another Limerick tax collector find himself in, well, a jam. Some angry residents are claiming that Malason, the incumbent in Nov. 7's contest for the post, misused township equipment to print campaign handbills.
April 10, 1997 |
The story is law enforcement's alligators-in-the-sewer tale. Maybe it happened somewhere, some time. Then again, maybe not. It goes like this: Two police officers interviewing a particularly gullible suspect hook him up - via a colander on his head - to a copy machine that they convince him is a lie detector. Every time the suspect answers a question in a suspicious manner, the machine pops out the message, "He's lying. " Confronted with his own lies, the suspect confesses.
November 2, 1995 |
The newly formed township civic association is calling for the removal of the incumbent tax collector from the Nov. 7 ballot, claiming he used the township copy machine to print campaign handbills. In a letter to Joseph Passarella, county director of voter services, Limerick Civic Association president Vicki Worrall also requested an investigation into township Tax Collector Robert Malason and his alleged misuse of the copy machine. Malason, a Republican, is running against Democrat William Miller.
September 1, 1994 |
Saying it was the only copy machine that could do the job, Bucks County officials approved a four-year lease for a single copy machine that will cost taxpayers at least $75,000. The price does not include paper. Costing about 17 times more than the typical lease on a copier, Bucks officials said, the copy machine for the Planning Department is among the most heavily used machines in the county. It is expected to produce between 60,000 and 100,000 copies a month and also reproduce maps.
March 14, 2006
THE CIA HAS given Scooter Libby a "Get out of jail" card. The CIA claims that copying 400 daily briefing papers for the president would take up to nine months. We know that the copying itself would not take this long, even if the briefing papers ran to 20 pages apiece. So, it must be that the effort of blacking out the items that the judge is not authorized to review that causes the problem. Perhaps this problem could be avoided by obtaining a security clearance for the judge. Surely, this shouldn't be a problem for a federal judge who has passed muster with our illustrious and quick-witted GOP Congress.
April 23, 1997 |
Maybe alligators do prowl the sewers. Maybe an old lady really did dry out her poodle in a microwave. Because at least one urban legend has proven true, and it's been traced to Bucks County. For more than 20 years the legend has made the rounds of police, lawyers, the news media and now, the Internet. A recent search uncovered it on six different Web sites. The tale is of a police officer who gets a confession by hooking up a suspect to a copy machine and pretending it is a lie detector.
March 19, 1992 |
When is a copy machine not a copy machine? When the tax collector and a councilman have turned it into a vacuum cleaner. And some officials in Colwyn, where it happened early this month, don't find it at all amusing. Councilman Paul Reitano was looking for a heavy-duty vacuum cleaner to clean the smartly renovated borough hall above the firehouse. Tax collector Edward Gannon had a line on a good one, a $417 number he could get for $288. He also was casting envious eyes at an old copier the borough was looking to get rid of. Hence the swap.
June 3, 1986 |
Fraternal Order of Police president Robert S. Hurst said yesterday that he planned to file a slander suit against a Philadelphia police officer who said that one of his colleagues saw Hurst with an advance copy of a police promotional examination in 1979. Police Officer Harold James, a 21-year veteran, made the accusation at a May 28 news conference held by the Guardian Civic League, a community service organization made up predominantly of black police officers. The league has contended that cheating on the examinations has hindered the promotion of qualified black officers to commanding positions in the Police Department.
August 11, 1995 |
Police are investigating an early-morning robbery Wednesday at Kinko's Copies on Route 73 during which a clerk was beaten and cash and computers valued at a total of $6,100 were taken. The clerk, a 21-year-old whose name is being withheld by officials for safety reasons, told police that five to seven males entered the store about 1:34 a.m. Wednesday. Little description of the suspects was available. One of the suspects asked for help with a copy machine and, when the employee approached the machine, he was attacked by the rest of the suspects, according to Officer Frank Plunkett.
October 11, 2000 |
Allen Iverson's violent and misogynistic lyrics have been have been blasted by rap critics and banned by Power 99 FM. Yet other rap artists get plenty of airplay and little or no scrutiny despite lyrics heavily laced with drugs, sex and violence. Check out the words of some of the other songs that play on the station: "Shake it Fast" Mystikal "This man right here want to get under that dress right here. You gotta bend all the way over to dance off this. " "Nasty Boy" Notorious B.I.G.