Gay Community

Shelly Komito had been married for 23 years and had had two children before she openly acknowledged that she was gay. That was 1995, and one of the first things she did, she said yesterday, was to call Congregation Beth Ahavah in Old City - a Reform congregation serving gays, lesbians and bisexuals from Pennsylvania, New Jersey and Delaware. "I told them my story," said Komito, 49, of that day five years ago. "And I asked if they could have some of their members call me. And they did. . . . And looking back on it now, I don't know what I would have done without their support.

I HAVE NEGLECTED gay culture for months. Most of the music tapes in my car are by straight performers. I gave up on Virginia Woolf's "Mrs. Dalloway" in frustration and am reading a book with a straight woman as the main character, although she does have a lesbian mom. So I feel somewhat guilty that the Oscar Wilde Bookshop in New York, the nation's oldest gay bookstore, is about to shut its doors. Not personally responsible, of course, since I don't live in New York, but I can't remember the last time I spent money in Philadelphia's counterpart, Giovanni's Room.

THE RELIGIOUS right is going after TV cartoons, for crying out loud, and can't Lynne Cheney just say what she truly thinks? These two thoughts fill my mind these days as the gay community becomes a target in some new, interesting ways. First, James Dobson, the leader of the myopic Focus on the Family, criticizes a video promoting tolerance in schools that features, among others, Spongebob SquarePants and Winnie the Pooh. No, he didn't imply that either was gay; he merely said they must not be allowed to use their considerable influence to say gay is OK. Then, U.S. Education Secretary Margaret Spellings denounces PBS for spending good tax dollars on a program featuring another animated character - Buster the bunny - that depicts a lesbian couple during Buster's visit to Vermont to learn about maple syrup.

My friend Bill, rest his soul, was pretty traditional when it came to the British monarchy. He had a strong regard for the royal family and admired the pomp and circumstance surrounding the Windsors. But I suspect he admired Princess Diana not only because she brought charm and glamour to the monarchy, but because she worked to fight AIDS, which eventually counted him among its victims. It has not been lost on the gay community that Diana - in life and in death - was a great friend of ours.

You know, I was just thinking: When is the last time I got together with a million or so of my closest friends? It was in 1993, when people from across the gay spectrum gathered in Washington and turned the nation's capital into a gay capital. It was exhilarating, empowering and enriching to be together with so many people who were out - or came out - for one thing: seeking our full civil rights. With a major increase in gay visibility and key victories in workplace, family and other arenas since the march, it's been a whirlwind five years - we're not in Kansas anymore.

They called him Mother. Members of New Hope's gay community revered feisty drag queen Joseph Cavellucci, 74, for nurturing gay pride since the day he arrived in town in 1949, looking for work as a female impersonator. Mother Joseph "Josie" Cavellucci, famous for strutting the streets with a pocketbook and stiletto heels, died Tuesday in a Bucks County nursing home after a long struggle with cancer. He leaves a legacy as a gay icon - a man whose sassy attitude defied sexual stereotypes long before any laws were enacted to protect against sexual discrimination.

The Vatican this week issued a provocative new lexicon that explains official Roman Catholic teaching on sex, marriage, abortion, AIDS and related topics. But just a day after the release, gay groups were calling the 900-page glossary "vicious" and "irresponsible. " Among other things, the Lexicon on Ambiguous and Colloquial Terms about Family Life and Ethical Questions asserts that homosexuality is "without any social value," and that legislation permitting gay marriage is the product of "deeply disordered minds.

Brian Sims, a 33-year-old lawyer, appears to have defeated Center City's longtime representative in the state House, setting himself up to become the first openly-gay state lawmaker in Pennsylvania. Sims held a 233-vote lead over his fellow Democratic opponent Babette Josephs, with 51.6 percent of the vote, according to unofficial returns. Returns from seven voting divisions in the 182d District were still described as incomplete, but Philadelphia election officials said Wednesday that this was likely the result of blank cartridges from voting machines that were not used on primary day. The election results in the Sims-Josephs race are unlikely to change, they said.

It could have been the jilted lover who left threatening messages on the answering machine and shouted angry words in public. It could have been a trusted friend, someone he allowed into his apartment, someone he knew for months, or years. Or, the murderer who bound and strangled Keith Matthews may have been a one-night stand, a violent end to a night of drinking and revelry among friends. On Feb. 25, Matthews, 32, was found strangled and gagged in his Washington Avenue apartment near 7th Street.

Philadelphia was host to one of the first gay-rights marches in the country in July 1965 in front of Independence Hall. Since then, a flourishing gay-friendly community known as the "gayborhood" has grown up around the area of 12th and Locust Streets in Center City. On Saturday the city will dedicate a 7,500-square-foot public mural, touted as the first of its kind in the country, paying tribute to gays, lesbians, bisexuals and transgendered people. Titled Pride and Progress, the city's 2,353d mural is one of its largest, and stretches almost a whole block alongside the William Way Community Center, which serves the city's gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgendered community.

Brian Sims, a 33-year-old lawyer, appears to have defeated Center City's longtime representative in the state House, setting himself up to become the first openly-gay state lawmaker in Pennsylvania. Sims held a 233-vote lead over his fellow Democratic opponent Babette Josephs, with 51.6 percent of the vote, according to unofficial returns. Returns from seven voting divisions in the 182d District were still described as incomplete, but Philadelphia election officials said Wednesday that this was likely the result of blank cartridges from voting machines that were not used on primary day. The election results in the Sims-Josephs race are unlikely to change, they said.

We've seen a lot of housewives on TV - desperate, mobbed up, real - and nowVH1 is throwing a new batch into the fishbowl. "Hollywood Exes," one-hour series airing this summer will star the ex-wives of Eddie Murphy, Prince, R. Kelly, Will Smith and Jose Canseco. The network said that Nicole Murphy, Jessica Canseco, Andrea Kelly, Sheree Fletcher (Smith's ex) and Mayte Garcia (Prince's ex) "want to show the world that they are more than just a trophy wife with a pretty face. " No better way to prove that than star in a reality TV show, right?

NOW THAT SNOOKI is engaged to Jionni LaValle, the presumed father of her baby, she can begin to concentrate on names for the little bambina/o. According to People , she's been concentrating on that for a while. The Snooks told the mag last year that she loves the names Gia and Isabella. She told GQ she also likes Giana. If it's a boy, however, she told People that she likes Tony and Frankie, but told GQ she might name the lad Jionni Jr.   Plot by Hitchcock Kim Novak has clarified why she used the word "rape" to describe how she felt about the Oscar-winning best picture, "The Artist.

BOSTON - Students and faculty at Harvard University are urging administrators to award posthumous degrees to seven students expelled from the Ivy League school in 1920 because they were gay or perceived to be gay. The group planned a rally today during a campus visit by Lady Gaga, who will be at Harvard to launch her Born This Way anti-bullying foundation. The singer has been a strong activist for the gay community. The group wants Harvard to formally abolish its so-called "secret court," a tribunal of administrators that investigated charges of homosexual activity among students in 1920.

TRENTON - As the green "yes" votes lit up the electronic board in the New Jersey Senate chambers Monday, Steven Goldstein, head of the state's largest gay-rights organization, jumped up and down and applause broke out on the floor and echoed from the balcony. The Senate had voted 24-16 to legalize same-sex marriage, a measure it rejected just two years ago. The bill is unlikely to become law, at least right away. Although the Assembly is expected to pass it Thursday, Republican Gov. Christie has vowed to veto it. Still, Goldstein refused to dismiss Monday's vote as just a legislative exercise.

The deal for the city to sell the local Boy Scouts headquarters to the scouting group has fallen through, leaving it unclear how Philadelphia will pay an estimated $963,575 in legal fees and, at least for now, handing a temporary victory to those who had opposed the plan. In a filing in federal court Friday, the Boy Scouts' attorney, Jason Gosselin, said: "The parties concluded that the settlement agreement would never be approved by City Council. " City Council legislation was required to sell the city-owned building to the Boy Scouts Philadelphia group, the Cradle of Liberty Council.

The deal for the city to sell the local Boy Scouts headquarters to the scouting group has fallen through, leaving it unclear how Philadelphia will pay an estimated $963,575 in legal fees and, at least for now, handing a temporary victory to those who had opposed the plan. In a filing in federal court Friday, the Boy Scouts lawyer, Jason Gosselin, said "the parties concluded that the settlement agreement would never be approved by City Council. " City Council legislation was required to sell the city-owned building to Boy Scouts Philadelphia group, the Cradle of Liberty Council.

Legalizing same-sex marriage is the first priority for legislative leaders in Trenton this session, which they made clear by numbering the bill "1" in both the Assembly and the Senate. A majority of New Jersey residents support gay marriage, but residents are far more concerned about the sluggish economy and unemployment, polls show. So why is the Democratic-led Legislature pushing the issue now, when Republican Gov. Christie has said he opposes same-sex marriage and could veto the bill?

Lou Maletta, 74, who founded the Gay Cable Network in 1982, when the gay-rights movement was not receiving broad media attention, died Nov. 2 in Kingston, N.Y. The cause was liver cancer, said Luke Valenti, his companion of 37 years. The network had its roots as a weekly program called Men & Film on Channel 35 on Manhattan Cable Television. Mr. Maletta showed gay pornographic movies that he had edited to make less explicit, and the programming grew to become a forum for the range of issues facing gay people.