Roy Halladay

Not everything Ruben Amaro Jr. has done as Phillies general manager has gone wrong. It just seems that way these days. In the beginning, Amaro's moves were mostly good. His first transaction after replacing Pat Gillick was to acquire John Mayberry Jr. from Texas for Greg Golson, an exchange of two underachieving former first-round draft picks. By no means was it a blockbuster deal, but Amaro at least got an extra outfielder who is still with the team while the Rangers took on a draft bust who is long gone.

The storm clouds gathered early last March. Ryan Howard was fielding ground balls on a stool. Chase Utley was conspicuously absent from Grapefruit League games. Roy Halladay's velocity was down. The Phillies had no obvious leftfielder, no veteran setup man, and an aging third baseman who had struggled to stay on the field the previous season. The fan base was understandably nervous. My answer to all who asked: It wouldn't surprise me if this team won 100 games, and it wouldn't surprise me if it lost 80. This year, the answer is the same, minus the 100 wins part.

It takes some searching for the Phillies organization to find a reason to believe, really believe, these days. There are games here and there that are uplifting, and individual accomplishments, like Domonic Brown's hot month and Cole Hamels' good start on Wednesday, that can brighten the darkness of a mediocre record. But to believe that the remainder of the season might hold far better things than those that have taken place so far takes some faith and some serious searching. Before Wednesday's game, in the late-morning sun while the groundskeepers prepared the diamond, a 6-foot-6 reason to believe sat in the home dugout and said he will pitch again this season, and he expects to pitch very well.

MY PREDICTION was for 88 wins. It was not an outrageous number, although it was a guess that was partially influenced by emotion. It was the last go-round, and I'll acknowledge rooting for it to be interesting, if nothing else. Eighty-eight. I thought it would maybe, possibly sneak the Phillies into the playoffs as the final wild card. Because while this was not a World Series-caliber team, or anything like it, this could have been a good team. Given that it was Roy Halladay's last shot, and how much better Chase Utley was navigating, and how hot Ryan Howard was in the spring, and how the core of the team had championship experience, it seemed possible that they would go down swinging, at the very least.

A surgeon cut into Roy Halladay's shoulder May 16 and five days later the Phillies' erstwhile ace arrived at the team's facility in Clearwater, Fla. There, an athletic trainer tested Halladay's range of motion. It was better than the results from spring training. Halladay, 36, is as optimistic as ever that he will pitch in 2013. The recovery process from shoulder surgery is not precise. The Phillies estimated six to eight weeks of rest from surgery until Halladay can start throwing.

ROY HALLADAY was at Citizens Bank Park on Monday when he saw his phone buzz. He picked it up and read the incoming message. "You're my hero," the text message read. It was from one of his two sons and Roy Halladay was so impressed and inspired by it that he relayed the very personal, encouraging message to the press corps following the latest discouraging effort on the mound. Following a 7-2 defeat to the New York Mets, a game that saw Halladay out before recording an out in the fifth inning, the 35-year-old pitcher said the 14.73 ERA he is sporting after two starts has nothing to do with his mechanics or his shoulder or his legs or his back.

CLEARWATER, Fla. - Roy Halladay threw his regular, in-between-starts bullpen session Wednesday while the vast majority of the Phillies enjoyed a rare day off. It was the first time Halladay took the mound since departing his start Sunday with a stomach illness after just one inning. Halladay said he lost about 10 pounds as a result of the bug, which sapped him of energy and strength before he resumed baseball activities Tuesday. On Wednesday, pitching coach Rich Dubee watched the two-time Cy Young Award winner's mound session.

PHOENIX - A surgeon will cut into Roy Halladay's shoulder Wednesday, one day after the pitcher turns 36. Halladay, a self-labeled optimist, refuses to focus on the possibility he will never pitch again, not for the Phillies or any major-league team. He insists he will return before 2013 is over. "It's too easy to look at the bad stuff," Halladay said. But, if this is how it ends, Halladay had something he wanted to say. He called an impromptu meeting with reporters before Friday's game at Chase Field and spoke for eight minutes.

Charlie Manuel offered a history lesson Tuesday afternoon. He was talking about Roy Halladay, once a Phillies ace but now unrecognizable, and brought up Brad Lidge's name. The former Phillies closer is the quintessential example of Manuel's loyalty. Lidge blew 11 saves in 2009, pitched to a 7.21 ERA, but remained the closer as the Phillies won the pennant. "I looked down there and, to me, Brad Lidge was probably still the best I had," Manuel said. "If I was going to lose the game, it was going to be with Brad Lidge.

TAMPA, Fla. - One of Rich Dubee's favorite sayings is, "He's fine. " The Phillies pitching coach will summon it in any situation - good or bad - when pressed about a particular arm. Dubee has repeated it over and over since Roy Halladay's discouraging Tuesday start. When Halladay displayed similar signs of distress last spring, Dubee said it then, too: "He's fine. " But Dubee knew it was not the truth. Halladay missed seven weeks during the season with back and shoulder issues.

Not everything Ruben Amaro Jr. has done as Phillies general manager has gone wrong. It just seems that way these days. In the beginning, Amaro's moves were mostly good. His first transaction after replacing Pat Gillick was to acquire John Mayberry Jr. from Texas for Greg Golson, an exchange of two underachieving former first-round draft picks. By no means was it a blockbuster deal, but Amaro at least got an extra outfielder who is still with the team while the Rangers took on a draft bust who is long gone.

MY PREDICTION was for 88 wins. It was not an outrageous number, although it was a guess that was partially influenced by emotion. It was the last go-round, and I'll acknowledge rooting for it to be interesting, if nothing else. Eighty-eight. I thought it would maybe, possibly sneak the Phillies into the playoffs as the final wild card. Because while this was not a World Series-caliber team, or anything like it, this could have been a good team. Given that it was Roy Halladay's last shot, and how much better Chase Utley was navigating, and how hot Ryan Howard was in the spring, and how the core of the team had championship experience, it seemed possible that they would go down swinging, at the very least.

MILWAUKEE - Manager Charlie Manuel glanced at his lineup card, folded over and worn from three hours of baseball Thursday, and summarized his starting pitcher's performance with 10 words. "He took us to a good spot in the game," Manuel said. The manager was describing Tyler Cloyd's 62/3 innings of scoreless ball, but that is a sentence he can use on most nights. The Phillies entered Friday with a winning record for the first time in 2013, and their starting pitching is a chief reason.

A surgeon cut into Roy Halladay's shoulder May 16 and five days later the Phillies' erstwhile ace arrived at the team's facility in Clearwater, Fla. There, an athletic trainer tested Halladay's range of motion. It was better than the results from spring training. Halladay, 36, is as optimistic as ever that he will pitch in 2013. The recovery process from shoulder surgery is not precise. The Phillies estimated six to eight weeks of rest from surgery until Halladay can start throwing.

SOMETIMES THE phone rang in Dunedin or Clearwater. Sometimes it rang wherever Cole Hamels happened to be pitching that day. Sometimes the conversation took place the next day, when the frustration had subsided a bit. But over the last trying month, the phone call would be made. And it would be answered. And whether it was Roy Halladay calling Cole Hamels or Cole Hamels calling Roy Halladay, the topic was pretty much the same, about a well-pitched game that ended in a loss, or more recently, about the aggregate psychological effect such losses have on a pitcher.

It takes some searching for the Phillies organization to find a reason to believe, really believe, these days. There are games here and there that are uplifting, and individual accomplishments, like Domonic Brown's hot month and Cole Hamels' good start on Wednesday, that can brighten the darkness of a mediocre record. But to believe that the remainder of the season might hold far better things than those that have taken place so far takes some faith and some serious searching. Before Wednesday's game, in the late-morning sun while the groundskeepers prepared the diamond, a 6-foot-6 reason to believe sat in the home dugout and said he will pitch again this season, and he expects to pitch very well.

Roy Halladay's trip down rehab road has officially started after Wednesday's surgery in Los Angeles went as well as could be expected, according to Phillies team physician Michael Ciccotti. Neal ElAttrache, the team physician for the Los Angeles Dodgers, repaired Halladay's shoulder and rotator cuff in an arthroscopic procedure. ElAttrache also removed the bursa that cushions the shoulder. A bone spur that was found in Halladay's shoulder did not need to be removed. "The major attachment sites of the rotator cuff - the cable, we call it - in the front and the back, they were still attached," Ciccotti said during a news conference Thursday at Citizens Bank Park.

THREE MONTHS ago, before the official announcement, Roy Halladay endorsed Cole Hamels as the new leader of the Phillies' rotation. Halladay had started 10 straight times on Opening Day, dating back to his days in Toronto, but in the early part of spring training the aging veteran acknowledged it was Hamels' time. "It should have been his spot a long time ago," Halladay said in February about the then-undecided assignment. "I think it's something he's going to embrace . . . I talked to him about it when we're going out and doing drills, stuff like that, it's time for him now to kind of step up and take charge in those situations and establish himself as the head of the staff.

IN THE SAME inning that saw Cole Hamels' day end, the Phils also cut the Cleveland Indians' lead to 5-3, thanks to a two-out, two-run double from Jimmy Rollins. Despite Hamels' lackluster effort, the game was well within reach. But in the next four innings, four different relievers entered and matched Hamels in allowing five runs. A middle of the bullpen tabbed as "mediocre" by general manager Ruben Amaro Jr. less than a week ago was just plain bad. The bad news: There's a chance the relief corps could get worse in the coming days.

THE MAGIC WORD during the near-15- minute-long briefing of Roy Halladay's recent surgery and upcoming rehab from Phillies team physician Dr. Michael Ciccotti? Possible. As in, all things are possible. Is it realistic to expect Roy Halladay back on a major league mound this season? According to Ciccotti, "It's very possible. " Would more time to recover - and thus, being shut down for the remainder of the season - help Halladay in the long run? "Very possible," Ciccotti said.